O@tNetflix: Norsemen/Vikingane

When hubby decided already during the second season that History Channel’s Vikings isn’t worthy of his audience anymore, his bold and sexy waifu kept on watching. Oh, I knew it was a shitshow, I knew the drama was on cheapest soapie level but the producers upped the budget and the production value basically from show to show, from season to season. And nowadays this formerly ultra barebones show comes up with decently made huge battles and setpieces on almost Hollywood movie level.

The drama part still sucks tho. Blame bad screenwriting or bad directing for it, or both, doesn’t matter. Fact is that Vikings is a disappointing show that stays far below its capabilities. Not even the money infusion helped raising the level of lame Canadian wannabe Vikings.

But now hubby, bless that genius, discovered a newer, fresher, better replacement show for all fans of Scandinavian conquerors and their ice-cool lifestyle:

Norsemen
Traitors and bishies: A spoof on Vikings? Maybe. But so much betterer!

Set in 790AD, Vikingane features the daily challenges of people living in a small Viking village, from power struggle, brother rivalry, gender equality, to betrayal and friendship. “It’s the story of people from our time, but living during the Viking era. Of course everyday choices have far more dramatic consequences and that makes for great comedy material.

IMDb: 7.8

Trond Fausa, Kåre Conradi, Mads Jørgensen, Henrik Mestad, Jon Øigarden, Marian Saastad Ottesen, Silje Torp, Nils Jørgen Kaalstad, Mikkel Bratt Silset, Øystein Martinsen, and Kristine Riis in Vikingane (2016)
Game of votes and elections and discussions.

Here are the main differences between Vikings and Norsemen/Vikingane:

– Norsemen isn’t made by some clueless Canucks but by the real deal, original Norwegians, the true successors of vikings.

Silje Torp and Nils Jørgen Kaalstad in Vikingane (2016)
Any similarities with the real fake, Canadian, Vikings are purely coincidental.

– Instead of trying to serve earnest but lukewarm drama, the Norsemen makers follow a comedian path quite decidedly. This isn’t a LOL jokefest but we feel very well entertained and always have a mild smile in our faces.

Trond Fausa, Kåre Conradi, and Kristine Riis in Vikingane (2016)
The Roman slave/creative director, the new chieftain and his horny bish wife having a jolly good time.

– Instead of Vikings’ often childish intrigues Norsemen shows us how real adult vikings discuss important socio-societal affairs. And how they solve their disputes. Ok, sometimes those discussion don’t end in a vote but in an unanimous killing. Or in an jarl getting his hands hacked off. Our problematic SJW viking hippies are barbarians after all and all that whining and moaning only gets you so far. :/

Jon Øigarden and Silje Torp in Vikingane (2016)
Katheryn Winnick’ Lagertha of Vikings is more beautifullerer but Freya (Silje Torp) is the much more fun role to play I guess.

– Since Norsemen’s budget is obviously smaller than Vikings’ the whole series is based more on interpersonal communication, so we get a lot of dialogue scenes. Thanks to a great integration this series doesn’t fall apart into a loose chain of Pythonesque skits but follows the main story arc rather tightly.

Jon Øigarden in Vikingane (2016)
The norse vikings were a funny bunch of practical jokesters. At least according to the TV show Norsemen.

And for Python moments they have chances galore. You see when they claim “It’s the story of people from our time, but living during the Viking era” it is true. Many of the scenes and dialogues are based on gender politics, traditions, objections to all the rape and murder and plundering, one could think we’re watching a gang of nerve wracking hippies from the 60s and 70s. 😮

Vikingane (2016)
No shieldmaidens in the Norsemen universe, here the male warriors can carry and hide under their shields all by themselves.

We get to see some old geezers refusing to jump off a cliff into their assured deaths. Obviously sitting by Odin’s side in Walhalla isn’t enough incentive for the old men. In another episode we see the chieftain’s wife, supposed to be raped by the conquering warriors. Her face shows serious disappointment when the brave winning warriors experience erectile dysfunctions and bow out one after the other and not even their jarl is able to do what has to be done. 😉

Vikingane (2016)
The battles are decidedly smaller scale and much shorter than in Vikings, which doesn’t matter much. It’s much more fun observing our SJW norsemen disputing about the socio-polital issues of the early dark ages.

We particularly like how non-PC and lightfooted Norsemen/Vikingane is.

The show’s quality isn’t always top notch but altogether much more rewarding than Vikings. This might partly be caused by the cast which shows, if not great acting talent, so at least a real eagerness and joy of playing their roles. It’s a bit like watching your friends of the soccer club rehearsing for the Xmas fairytale stageplay. Re-discovering some leading actors from the other internationally successful Norge TV show Lilyhammer was fun.

Vikingane (2016)
Contrary to Vikings the Norsemen are using real fake longboats, not CGI ones.
This is even real fjord water they are sailing in!

You know with a general population of around 23 people (less in winter) they don’t have that many gifted and successful actors, so logically re-discovering some of our darlings from a few years ago was fun.

Marian Saastad Ottesen, Nils Jørgen Kaalstad, and Kristine Riis in Vikingane (2016)
Feminist claims are being made! And this is not up for discussion!

So is Norsemen the show of the 21st century? No, fuk no!!! But it’s still more rewarding than a lot of the other shit we get to see daily from other, far bigger production companies and with far more famous actors. Norsemen is just fun to consume.

Kristine Riis in Vikingane (2016)
The jarl’s new bish waifu was sooo looking forward to the public rape but witnessing the failure to stand up by her capturers, she’s rather disappointed. 😦

Sometimes brutal, sometimes brutally honest, sometimes SJW feminist, sometimes really misogynistic. Sometimes on the brink of full emancipation … mostly nonsense, the female norsewomen don’t need such learned terms as they just do whatever they want.

Hard Rock or already Heavy Metal? I guess Vikingane’s more like skate punk.;)

The whole series meanders between gross and politicaly incorrect humour which could already be a bit too strong for the conservative family oriented, churchgoing USAmerican consumer sheeple. So be adviced and be warned to get objected to nerve wracking SJW disputes, even some mild blood and gor … and piss and kak …

Hej! No upskirting the ladies if you wanna avoid the Golden Shower to the eyes! So don’t look up and … fuksakes … HEJ! Do! Not! Look! Up!

What the YouTube movie reviewers had to say:

Nothing. Couldn’t find a single not-cringeworthy review so here, looky a teaser instead:

What’s left to say about this harmless little show: Not much, as it speaks for itself. I will recommend watching Norsemen/Vikingane when it appears in a pirating viking bay near you and you’re nored outta your silly skulltattoo. In comparison to Vikings it’s like what The Orville is compared to Star Trek: Discovery. Cheaper, not really connected but so much besterer! And funnierer!

Theater rehearsals in the Norsemen’s very own amphiteatre. Gotta see the pantomime show, it’s magic. 😉

And good news: They are producing a third season. And why not? Despite not being very high class TV Norsemen is entertaining enough and far besterer than it’s bigger, fatter and more rich competitor from the other side of the Northern Ocean.

Trond Fausa in Vikingane (2016)
… almost as magic as the disappearing thumb, which boggles the mind of even the most shrewd plundering viking warrior. 🙂

 

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