Samlara “Sammie” Vintner and Maiti “Miata” Yenni are, let’s put it mildly, not on the best friendly terms. God knows why, the rest of us don’t give a singular frack about the why and how. It’s too boring I guess.
But, know what, know what’s much more interesting and nailbitingly suspenseful? Both of ’em bishies are on the cusp of joining the wonderful world of Linux apologetes! Maiti is about to receive a new wonderputer and Sammie is about to maybe replace her fukn cellphone with a real, although old-ish PC. And while Maiti has already made plans which of her older PCs she wants to set up on Linux and for what use scenario it shall be used for (methinks some media server or sumfink), with Sammie things are looking a bit more dreary. That girl always claims to get a new/old laptop … but then it falls through because the hardware is too fracked up and not usable anymore.
So, I guess the game’s afoot, the race is on. And what better way to settle this unsavoury rivalry once and for all than with a fair race for the first successful Linux install? Me will be the judge for that.
So, even if Maiti has set herself a much more complicated task, she seems to be miles ahead right now. Sammie, on the other hand, who has nothing else to do than just downloading and installing an unspecified run-of-the-mill GNU/Linux distro on just some hardware, has fallen wayyyyy way way behind.
Girls, what about an update? How do do your projects come about? Where are you now? Recieved your new Alienware box yet, Maiti? Found anything you can at least use as a secondary computer, Sammie? Come on, they must have a Gumtree, Craigs List or ebay in France as well, no? Just look out for anything that says “lapé eau topé machine computeusè” or so and fukn get it! Millions of unsuspecting Orcablog readers are waiting for the result with baited breath …
Peeps, you know what? I’m slowly starting to get behind the truth about why nobody uses Linux these days. In a world ruled by commerce, a world in which we pay highest prices for perishable vegan foods and the most fancy but ultimately needless wearable fashions, it seems to be an unsolvable task for most people to acquire a secondary computing machine. Guys, these things are, like, super cheap! And they are highly usable and can make your life so much richer and more enjoyable. Do you really need another scandalous frock, just to be worn once, at a silly party and ruined by spilling an expensive and embarrassing blend of champagne/merlot/cidre/snails/cocaine/puke all over it? (There went your new/old laptop, hun). No! What you need instead is a cheapo little computer with Linux and your home entertainment system on it. That’s so much more wholesome. And it will make you a better mensch!