Our New Housemate

Heyyy, y’all remembah the Cape Robin I caught shitting all over our lounge? As happy as he seemed to be escaping from the great white huntress, we continuously found bird droppings in the lounge and kitchen area. Could it be that … nooo, unbelievable. Not even a bird would be so stupid to continue with that shit, not after what happened to him/her the other day.

Or would they?


Well, yes, they would! Today when I went into the kitchen to take a load of washing out of the machine I saw the same birdy trying to escape through the closed window. Fukn birdbrain, sooo stupid.


Well, I grabbed my trusty Canon but he or she didn’t use the lucky occasion to escape through the front door but kept on boinging against the screen, until I went closer to the backyard door to open it for him … but then he flew through the lounge and out through the front door. So, he obviously knows the esccape route quite well but is just to distressed once one of his/hers human co-habiters are in the same room.


Now the question remains, what the fuk does he/she want in our house? We figured since the last two summers we had almost no mosquitoes, them birds are sooo fukn hungry they grab every opportunity they get to infiltrate human habitats and steal some breadcrumbs or so. Good theory?

Lucy, Tamm, what  do you experts think. And how can we prepare some food for our new buddy on the stoep (front porch) so he won’t need to come inside and crap all over the place?

AbalonePS: Environmental activists be advised: Yes, the bird is sitting on an abalone. Yes, we know quite well they are protected and it’s totally forbidden to have them. But we didn’t poach abalone, we really hate those poachers and are always happy when police arrests another gang. I have no idea where we found that one we have or where we got it from. We used it as ashtray but now we don’t smoke anymore and it’s just laying around on the window sill. Anyway, we got the abalone wayyyy before we even knew what it was and that it’s illegal. Just thought cool big shell. So please forgive me.


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