I guess I never said a bad word about Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens, or did I? (Yes, I did.) In fact I didn’t do an O@tM about it at all and only mentioned it kinda positively in regards of other SW movies and movies in general. But this won’t stand! Not any longer. Not at all. Thinking about it, and particularly after having watched Rogue One I guess it’s not just save to say Force Awakens was slightly disappointing, but a total and utter catastrophe. Even worse, Force Awakens was not just the worst Star Wars movie but one of the Wurst Moovies Evar!!!
How come? How did I change my mind so radically? Well, there were various factors at work here, the new Rogue One is one reason, a whole year time to think about Force Awakens is yet another.
There were some things in FA that bugged me right from the first time I’ve watched this trainwreck, many little inconsistencies, plot holes and illogical character behaviour. And over time all these small things (each of which already bad enough to give the movie a bad rating) added up and made me totally change my mind about FA. But as it so happened we were all so excited and happy to see a new part of the saga finally seeing the light of day, we were also in a mood to forgive the one or other movie sin.
And that, boys and girls, that was a mistake. A bad mistake even. Because when you look at FA with a very analytical view, when you dig a bit deeper than just the shiny new surface, you’ll discover what a pure and utter shitshow FA really is.
Here is a YouTube video by a guy who did exactly that. More than one hour of overanalyzing the shortcomings of a popculture movie. A really nerdy and geeky (yes, both) tour de force, a masterpiece in itself:
A word of warning: Yes, this video is over an hour long, so please stock up on
beerwater, ciggiessushi, and visit the loo before you dive deep into the intestines of the well-known Galaxy Far Far Away. Watching this is a demanding task, but well worth it. If you’re a movie lover that is; and who here ain’t a movie lover, eh?
But if you don’t have that much time, I guess after about 15 minutes you’re already wise enough to kick The Force Awakens into eternal damnation. Because this movie made every single possible mistake in the book, it’s really beyond hope and repair. No need to watch the rationale up to the end; you’ll know FA was a trainwreck pretty early on.